Self portrait

A brush with the Kittyhawk

I drove three black sailors from the Kittyhawk (aircraft carrier). They were going from a bar area back to the NAS navy base, where the ship is parked (berthed?). They had just come back from Japan, and I asked them if they liked it. They had two observations about Japan:

1. Japanese girls are easy. Their only requirement: don't lie and don't cheat. "You just don't tell them you have other girls, and everything's great. They cook for you and treat you right."

2. The Japanese don't brush their hair (sailors' claim). I asked about that, and one of them said: "Maybe it's 'cuz I'm a black man, but we brush our hair. The NEX (Navy Exchange, on-base retail store) ran out of brushes and they never got more." So they went out into the towns and cities searching for a hair brush. Not only did no store carry a hair brush, but the Japanese didn't have any idea what they were talking about.

The guy said: "I finally played charades with one dude, and he brought me to the dog section and pointed at dog brushes." I burst out laughing at the story, and he and his fellows laughed, too.

Is is true? the Japanese don't brush their hair? Or do they use something besides brushes and combs?

The sailor told me, just before paying at Avis near the airport, that if he ever gets stationed in Japan again, he's bringing a crate of brushes, and when the NEX runs out, he's going to sell them for $50 each.

Returning the rig in Golden Hill

Driver games: Zach and Slingblade

We've had some terrific radio fights between Zach and Sunshine (who has been renamed Mr. Congeniality, and sometimes Slingblade). Usually we let Slingblade bellow and cause trouble without attempting to counter him. He's one of those people that has to be handled delicately because, well, he's a psycho cab driver and we know he's done time for assault in the past. Nobody wants to push him too far. Enter Zach, our young driver who doesn't give a damn.

Slingblade jumped the line of drivers trying to reach dispatch and Zach was on him:

Zach: I called first.

Slingblade: Doesn't matter. It's who she heard first.

Zach: Respect the call-in order.

Slingblade: You haven't worked here very long, let us handle it.

Now somebody was stepping on him, keying the mic when he spoke. It may have been Zach, but it could have been anybody. In the middle of this entertainment, somebody held down their mic and played the theme song from the movie Rocky.

Slingblade: Stop cutting me off, Zach.

Zach: Get ahold of yourself.

Slingblade: No, you get ahold of yourself.

That blew over in a few minutes. Later that night I got into the mix, which I usually try to avoid. Slingblade yelled at somebody on the radio, and I mimicked Zach's voice: "Get ahold of yourself."

Slingblade: Only queers do that. You're a queer, aren't you, Zach? You like to get ahold of yourself?

I laughed so hard I almost had to pull over. I had drunks in the car, and they were amused at the exchange. Later on a cab stand I jokingly apologized to Zach. He said: "Funny, I never knew I was 'queer'."

We all speculated on who had brilliantly played the Rocky theme song, but nobody would admit to it. Just having the song and then being quick enough to queue it up and play it during the radio fight was fantastic. Several days later we're still talking about it. I wonder which smug bastard is inwardly gloating at this?